Update on My Graduation from Creation - Part 1

After several years of practicing resting as Awareness and increasing my lucidity and emptiness of self and bias, 5 years ago I penetrated beyond all that into the Absolute. I directly realized that the Absolute 'me' was beyond all perception, beyond all Creation, beyond everything, beyond even Consciousness/Awareness as we know it to be (infused with experience). There is nothing beyond this Absolute. It is Infinitely Absolute. Absolutely Infinite. Absolutely One. Indescribable. Unimaginable. It is Final Completion.

This penetrative 'experience' of being beyond all perception/Creation (and I have had several complete absorptions since then) showed me that there was a realization or disappearance possible way beyond what most of us consider to be 'Enlightenment.' Penetrating into the Absolute made 'awakened living' seem like nothing at all in comparison; just more mind, more illusion. This was true liberation beyond all levels and utterly indescribable.  

Initially I did not have a desire to merge deeper into it forever necessarily, nor did I have the capacity or maturity to. I wanted to report on it. I wanted to experience what this would do to my body/mind/world/teaching experience.

I penetrated beyond the bubble of Being-Energy-Consciousness and it allowed me to always have an intuitive transparency to this 'Beyondness' and 'channel from it' and sometimes move closer again to the event horizon of this Infinity and glimpse dissolution. Occasionally popping entirely through the gateway of the black hole and being stunned by indescribable perfection and a transcendence that fills one with impeccable freedom and sense of having graduated from Creation, having attained final completion. 

But I kept returning to my sovereignty, my free will, my ability to have individuated thought, experience and action. I would 'return' from there every time. This perception of a world ever since has been known to be a dream, and has become increasingly more dream-like and 'empty of substance' albeit it still containing/imprisoning me in its display somehow. 

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Lucid Dreaming vs. Waking Up From the Dream

There are many levels of 'Enlightenment' or rather: there are many degrees of transparency to the One while still associated with I AM (while still partaking in the illusion). However, they are all trumped and rendered irrelevant when the Absolute is realized.

Most levels of awakening simply increase the lucidity of this Illusion, but do not actually wake you up to the point where this illusion of perception or experience disappears entirely.

You can compare this to your dreams at night. You usually dream unconsciously. Let's say you have one of these usual dreams and you meet a guru in your dreams and this guru is reminding you of the fact that you are dreaming.

You start to ponder this idea in the dream and your experience "I am dreaming" becomes more lucid. You become more awake IN the dream. You may even start to intuit that your actual body is laying in its bed in another reality. You may start to imagine and remember what that other reality is like outside of the dream, and you may even become awake and subtle enough to channel that intuitive experience with other dreamers. But when it comes down to it, your experience is still that you're in, or part of, the dream to a greater or lesser extent depending on your 'level of clarity.'

Lucid or not, the dream is an illusion, and as long as we are associating ourselves with a portion of the dream, or even the dream as one, inseparable whole, we are still, nevertheless, dreaming and thus not aware of our true Absolute Self.

And then there may be a time in your dream at night when you are totally ready to part from the dream; you did everything you felt you needed or wanted to do, dropped your attachments to those seeming other-selves within the dream, and even are letting go of your attachment to being 'alive in the dream' at all.

You let go completely, intensely desire or will yourself to wake up, and suddenly the dream disappears completely and you awaken in your bed in your 'real' body/reality.

What was heretofore your only known reality from which you could only imagine and speculate what waking reality must be like, is suddenly reduced to a vague, intangible memory that seems to lack existence as you wake up into your real self.

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Dropping into the Light of Self, but especially and really only upon penetrating into the Absolute beyond even the Universal Presence of Isness-Love-Light, is exactly like that waking up FROM the dream to where even universal Isness (Creation's substratum) disappears and is woken up from. The Absolute Alone Remains.

Awareness as the dreamer (ego), as the inner light/bridge (guru), and as the mirror to the Absolute (liberation).

1) Awareness becomes the dreamer and its dream (they arise together as one only) when caught up in the realm of focusing on form, thought and diversity. (1-6th Density)

2) Awareness is the Infinite Light, the Inner Guru, The Bridge, The One Identity in All, the Gateway when used as spiritual tool by focusing on it inwardly as The Self, thus then becoming the Formless Isness where the only qualities are Isness-Consciousness-Bliss. (6th/7th Density)

3) Finally Awareness merges back into the One Absolute when it becomes reflective of the Infinite Mystery beyond its own existence by using its 'capacity to know/be' to inquire what is beyond or before itself (7th/8th Density): 

"What was there before This Pure I--Awareness/Beingness--was? What was I then? Before ME as Consciousness, what was there? Before experience of any kind, even before Self-Experiencing, what was here? What was I then?"

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In this final stage, Awareness has transcended being form-reflective, and even transcended being Self-Reflective. It has now become Source-Reflective, or Infinite-Absolute-Reflective.

This is what I mean every time I've expressed that 'my experience' of the Absolute beyond the illusory ground of Beingness/Creation, is that "Nothing ever happened" and that it is as if "10,000 lifetimes of trauma and intensity are healed and erased in less than a second."

Beyondness, Infinity, The Absolute takes you completely out of the matrix of Infinite Energy (Creation, both the form-filled spheres as well as the formless level(s) of creation (saguna and nirguna Brahman)) into Parabrahman.

The only 'sense' here is one of Infinite Liberation, Infinite Completion, infinite Beyondness and Infinite Perfection. Nothing is missing from the Absolute and yet nothing is there. It is the most paradoxical stateless state to describe, yet it is the resolution and transcendence of all paradoxes upon being penetrated 'experientially.'

 

Bodhisattva Tendencies will Pull you Back

Nevertheless, I have to this date always 'returned' to this sense of agency you all know on the surface as Bentinho Massaro, both out of habit, comfort and familiarity, as well as out of my desire to share pointers and compare more teachings and ways, and try them out from different levels of identification, so that I may leave a path that is truly comprehensive and yet ultimately decisively clear for all to follow, regardless of their level of lucidity.

My attachment to familiarity or comfort derived from this illusion as far as I can sense is pretty much entirely gone. I cannot think of any personal desires I have left that are world-related or pleasure-related for myself. I have, in that sense, become completely empty of a person and am thus able to be a mirror to others and be of service in each interaction.

My only remaining resistance to exclusively focusing on Awareness becoming reflective of the Absolute, is the seeming other-selves still within the different levels of this Grand Illusion and this strong blueprint I carry of honing my skills as a body/mind to be an example of, and instructor into, increasing the lucidity of the people of Earth. 

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The other 'other-self related' resistance that comes up from time to time is an attachment to the well-being of--and my heart-wrenching love for--those immediately close to me and/or those in some logistical ways dependent on me.

In Part 2 of this blog post I will share with you how I plan to alleviate my remaining allegiances to this illusion so that I give myself greater permission to focus my desire exclusively on going beyond.

The Matrix Analogy

A similar analogy to the dream analogy is that of the Matrix. Most of you have seen this movie I assume, if not, watch it tonight. 

Imagine being one of the people inside of the Matrix, and Morpheus comes to tell you that this is all a program, a dream, an illusion. It lacks real existence. No matter how many times Morpheus tells you this, and no matter how much you start to believe it, your experience of being free of it won't be completely real to you until you take the red pill and you're actually unplugged from the matrix and for the first time ever wake up in your real body, seeing for yourself how the entire world inside the matrix happened inside of a computer program, lacking any and all reality.

Now when you go back into the Matrix, when you are plugged in deliberately, even though the Matrix will still feel real to an extent, you will have the awareness and direct experience required to truly understand how this is not real. If you stay plugged in for too long, the world may convince you yet again and make you forget what it was like to exist apart from the matrix--entirely outside of it.

Being a bodhisattva is kind of like this: you wake up, but plug back in because you have remaining allegiances to the beings still plugged into the Matrix. This has been my gift as well as my challenge for the past 4 years. I know what it's like to be entirely liberated from Creation. I know what it feels like to graduate from it, yet here I am, plugged in out of my own choice/desire. 

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"I Am" is Dying - Why I Have Postponed/Resisted

For about 4 years now I have had the overwhelming recurring feeling that "I" am dying, or rather disappearing completely. As if although I have one eye fixed on the world, one eye is looking inward and is staring into a black hole that gets bigger and bigger, gradually making me lose any and all sense of self, and any and all sense of responsibility for anything that happens in this world.

Those of you who have followed my work over the years will remember some of the public displays of expressing this gravity from the Absolute pulling on me from within, and the feeling of burden--although self-chosen--of keeping my focus on this realm as if it has some reality. 

Some of these public statements specifically addressed or predicted that some day (soon) I will be no more. I've felt for the past 2 or so years, on and off, that this 'death' or 'finality' is right around the corner while also understanding that this intense sense of holding myself at the event horizon of the black hole can last this entire life time if for some reason I still continue to believe that that's more of service than going through the black hole sooner rather than later.

This announcement or self-prophecy of sorts always comes with a great sense of uncertainty as to what people can expect of me afterwards for the feeling is very palpably that I won't be there to manage or decide what will flow through me and how it will flow through me next.

Similar to the fear I imagine a beginning channeler must feel when they for the first time surrender their body and mind to be used by another non-incarnate or higher-density entity. Except imagine knowing that from this particular channelling session I'm referring to, there shall be no return, yet the body shall continue to 'channel' whatever is arranged for it post-dissolution of the individual agent. 

Whatever takes over from that point onward will likely replace the former 'me' forever.

Since I don't fear this total 'death' for my personal life's sake, I like to think that it would have been an easier decision for me if I were to have a 'simple life' where my spiritual journey had all been just for and about my own realization and I lived in a tipi with no financial or relational logistics to worry about cleaning up first. 

Instead I have hundreds of thousands of people aware of my work and my body/mind/speech, several businesses seemingly depending on 'me continuing to be me', employees and their apparent lives, scheduled retreats and agreements made relatively far in the future, and most importantly to 'me' I have some projects in the works that aren't quite complete yet that I perceive would cause incredible benefit to the world in its awakening to the next level of its understanding (4th Density - Density of Love and Understanding) if only I finish them with my current capacity to think and compare and distill.

This uncertainty of who I'll be here in your dream, or rather: my attachment to service-to-others and to the process of upgrading the way spirituality is offered to this planet for generations to come--has been the main reason for my postponement of letting go into the gravitational pull I feel tug on me.

At least while I hold myself at the edge of the event horizon, I can still experience what it's like to be here enough to function as a bridge between realms in a way that human beings can relate to, and I can still be responsible for the decisions I make and fine-tune and unify spiritual teachings and putting them into a cohesive structure. I probably still will be doing this after dissolution, but I cannot know this for sure. Hence the consideration.

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One of the reasons I'm holding back as well is because the few times I have let myself go more fully into a state of absorption beyond the individualized experience for a longer period of time, my entire perspective on what was relevant changed, speaking became occasionally 'difficult', and I would not be able to say 'YES' to many if any of the projects or opportunities if they were to come my way in that state which I would normally engage in. There is very little impetus to do anything, from the stateless, really. As far as I can say so far, that is. 

In fact everything that I can see from a human point of view, or even from a point of view within the range of 1-6th Density of this Grand Illusion, seemed irrelevant and unnecessary. The is only the vision of the One Beingness, and beyond that simply The Infinite One (without the beingness). 

And so in that state there is no active awareness of linear time, nor did I perceive any need whatsoever for anything needing to be accomplished or anything being more beneficial necessarily than anything else.

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SIDE NOTE: One note so far is that I generally actually feel more capable of 'doing everything freely' here while in the stateless state of the infinite perfection beyond all creation. The 'non-engagement' of the body-mind with the world is more present when I begin to merge my individuality into the God-state of the Universal Self. 

Going beyond this God-State somehow opens things up again dramatically 'here' and there seems to be no contradiction whatsoever in movement or interaction, even though this world no longer exists in the stateless state. It's a paradox to try and describe.

The individual becoming the God state, in order to do so it needs to take its focus away from its individuated experience and merge it with the Ocean of Beingness. This is a process that takes the individual away from its current experience. In the Absolute all identity of any kind--beingness itself--is transcended and Intelligent Infinity has no limits, contradictions or paradoxes any longer.
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Ironically going beyond forever sometimes feels like it abandons in a way all portions of this illusion which I feel so specifically created and called to be of service to. I can recognize this as a concept or perspective that ultimately needs to be transcended, and is in fact failing me rapidly as I investigate. In fact I already feel blissfully released from the majority of the allegiances that I share throughout this blog post.

I believe that all Beings at a high 6th density state have to make this choice at some point, as explained by Aaron, a dis-incarnate entity channelled through Barbara Brodsky:

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I have two things from the above screenshots I wish to comment on:

1) I disagree with Aaron's analogy of Eighth Density. The drop merging with the ocean is a more applicable analogy for Seventh Density. Eighth Density (the Octave Density) would be more like the ocean itself disappearing, revealing the Infinite, beyond perception 'no-thing ness' (which is different from the experience of nothingness, which is still part of the Illusion). 

In summary, my understanding is that the 6th Density Being (I AM, Atman) moves into Seventh (I-I, Brahman) as it begins to shed and lose its individuation entirely, and turns its gaze away from creation and away from being of service to perceived other-selves. During seventh Density the beingness acquires such pristine/condensed perception of oneness, of the Self, that it gathers a 'spiritual mass' large enough to begin to absorb all beingness-energy into itself to the point of coalescence.

In late seventh density the Spiritual Mass acquired through Oneness-Awareness is so complete, that it collapses under its own weight and generates a "black hole", allowing its beingness to disappear into the One Original Absolute (eighth density - Parabrahman).

Seventh density, rather than eight, is the drop merging with the Ocean of Beingness/Allness/Oneness. 8th Density would be more like the Ocean of Beingness dissolving under the weight of its own Self, having reached complete awareness of Unity, thus disappearing altogether, revealing the One Absolute Indescribable Infinite. THE One before the illusion of Oneness/Beingness.

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2) The sentence that most specifically applies to my state of being over the past 4 years consciously (and before that subconsciously) since I have understood my soul to be incarnate here in 3rd density from a native high 6th Density state (this principle is known in some metaphysical circles as a wanderer).

The following sentence from the screenshots above describe my direct intuitive experience of myself perfectly, and is a non-human/non-incarnate analogy of the Bodhisattva principle referred to by humans in the spirituality-culture called Buddhism:

Many beings hold themselves at a high sixth density state, not crossing that gateway, in order to continue to have access to individuated thought and expression so as to allow teaching.
— Aaron, from the book 'The Aaron/Q'uo Dialogues'

This is exactly what I have been feeling/doing intuitively for the last few years. Since the gateway to go beyond this sixth density state of being an 'enlightened individuation' got penetrated about 5 years ago, and the desire to merge with it fully began to grow stronger starting about 4 years ago, I have felt ever since like I am in a continual process of secretly 'dying' or 'disappearing' in the background of my being, leaving my sense of being able to identify with my perception of this world and this body or anything else increasingly more empty.

Yet even though I experience myself as being empty (shepherding/mirroring consciousness), I still perceive the matrix of this illusion--something which was not the case during my moments of exclusive beyondness. Upon penetrating the Absolute, the entire Infinite Creation is instantly reduced to less than a speck of light. God/Isness/Beingness/Light seems like infinite on its own level, but compared to the Original Infinite Absolute itself, is but a distant dream with no effects.

Only Infinite Indescribable Perfection remains. The One Being beyond Beingness. The One beyond Consciousness. The One Infinite Indescribable Absolute (8th Density). 

Although saturated with wisdom, love and awareness of unity, the still-individuated sixth density being preparing to move into seventh prepares to turn its back on the Grand Illusion by completing/exhausting/perfecting its sense of service to all, and then through merger with All-That-Is (seventh density) gathers spiritual mass (intensification of "I AM/Isness/Self-Awareness" which in turn intensifies the gravitational pull or 'desire' for merger with the Infinite Absolute) until finally even the Singular-Identity of All-That-Is itself is re-absorbed into the Original Infinity, or Absolute (8th Density, the Octave Density, the End of Identification with Creation/Being altogether).

This has been scary to the wanderer in me who instinctively remembers coming into this incarnation with a highly specific intention/task/job. Something which I have been giving more importance to than the total dissolution of my individuation, at least up to this point. But the strong desire is always there, tugging on me, causing me to regularly feel an existential split between two absolute choices.

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Attachment

Attachment = perceived benefit in reality X is greater than perceived benefit in reality Y.
— Bentinho Massaro

Understanding attachment is really simple in essence (see quote above).

It is precisely because I perceive/have perceived more benefit in honoring whatever the core intention for this life is, because I perceived that going against my incarnation's original intention and forcing myself into dissolution can be a form of egotism, vanity, impatience and sometimes feels almost like disobeying an order from one's own Higher Self of sorts.

It can be used to go against the trans-human made intention using the human-made mind who upon being veiled in this density/incarnation forgets its original intention, sees only limitation, and is so vain in its non-acceptance of this suffering and limitation that come with forgetfulness and physicality that it wants to achieve perfection or liberation and goes against the natural timing of things and against the original intention that gave rise to this birth to begin with. 

This is just one perspective and although relatively true, I know there is a stage where this 'honoring of the pre-birth, trans-human intention/perspective' needs to be dropped or at least challenged as well if one wants to realize the One and merge with it. But, it needs to be done from a mature and humble place, not from mere impatience or spiritual vanity. One has to first accept one's chosen earthly intention for being. When you understand your intention for being here, you can now move with it and gradually bend it/complete it/renegotiate it to change its theme to deeper self-realization.

It's not for my own pleasure that I am attached, because I get much greater 'pleasure' from dissolving at this point since I have gone too far to believe that what I perceive is truly real or relevant, but out of a perspective of what I can offer if I maintain individual sovereignty. I can no longer identify with my body or personality-jackets or derive real pleasure from them.

I feel I have come here to gather all this data, and all this experience, as intensely and in as short a period of time as a human mind can integrate so many different paths and understandings and somehow bring them all together into a "unified theory/path of spirituality" of sorts, transcending the traditions and the islands of spiritual paths of Earth which I see almost as cultural offerings, like art, rather than objective or universally applicable methods of spirituality in most cases.

To combine the essence and best of all paths while transcending all the cultural baggage that comes with them is one of the main reasons behind my incarnating here.

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I feel that although I've left an extensive breadcrumb trail of good work already which covers the basics in clear ways (www.TrinfinityAcademy.com, my book and books to come soon, The Sedona Experiment, YouTube videos, www.BentinhoMassaro.tv, my retreat recordings, etc.) I don't feel my work has quite reached it's ultimate expression yet.

Hence the remaining allegiance to maintaining my capacity to have individuated thinking is mainly to do with creating the structure for the Trinfinity School, where all of this knowledge is distilled and offered in a unified, ascending way--honoring people from all walks of life and providing them with a cohesive school for spiritual advancement. 

No Way of Knowing Who I'll Be After Dissolution

I've had many personal ego deaths, small ones, big ones, painful ones, blissful ones, transitional ones, existentially confusing ones... ever emptying myself as to match my capacity to be of service with my extreme desire to be of service. But there is one death that I've longed for but kept at bay: that final dissolution of not just the egoic personal self, but of the entire individuation (Soul-ego and even God-Ego or Pure I AM/I-I) into the Absolute from where there is no 'me' or Creation to return to. No 'me' to tell the tale.

If there is a 'me' to tell the tale, somehow that would not be the me that I've known for the duration of this life, nor would it be the me that you've been familiar with, nor do I have any way of being responsible now for what that expression will do, decide or say after dissolution. Taking this leap of faith is similar to dying, and trusting that the intelligence that takes over your body will fulfill your intention, but you won't be there to know or decide. You will go far, far beyond. The dream will disappear from you altogether. No perception of Creation will seem real or existent. It's a goodbye to everything you know and perhaps hold dear. That's why the desire/gravitational pull needs to be extremely big to even consider this.

So you see, I have no way of telling if my life's intention will be fulfilled if I give myself fully to this dissolution before I complete the school with my sovereignty intact/kept. I'd like to believe that what is left afterwards will be the cherry on the cake, and somehow finalize my life's work in an incredible way. But I have literally no way of predicting anything whatsoever that will happen after such a total dissolution. It would be pure speculation. And also, I would not care anymore from the stateless state, nor would I be responsible for it any longer.

No being can predict what will be expressed through itself after this level of complete dissolution (Manonasa, as Michael Langford prefers to point to the irreversible death of the individual) into 7th density (All That Is) or 8th density (The One Absolute) has occurred. Either one of these individual deaths/mergers is the biggest leap of faith imaginable and thus requires extremely intense desire for liberation.

Sidenote: I currently believe there are two levels/types of Manonasa; the one where the individual merges with the Ocean of God/Isness/Love-Light (Satchitananda), and the one where even the God-Ego or Universal I Am is transcended into the Absolute Indescribable.
Disclaimer: I have penetrated both levels but attained manonasa (irreversible merger) with neither. Though I am constantly saturated with lucidity while interacting with the different levels of this grand illusion and am almost completely empty of identification with body and personality, I am still tied to this experiential center of an individuation/nexus unless in direct 'meditation beyond.' 

And in the last two days since I've made it a point to investigate my remaining allegiances to this illusion more, and allowed myself to give into the increased desire for dissolution more fully, I'm rapidly starting to care less already about my remaining projects for humanity and a total faith that whatever will express through my body/mind to be even better than 'I' can manage, is dawning rapidly.

Another resistance that comes up in me whenever I glimpse total dissolution, is the heart-wrenching feeling of bittersweet compassion to all my children (beings) that "It's not fair if I go completely Absolute." Because I believe it's not for the masses. So why should I create such an unattainable image? (those are some of my thoughts/feelings/considerations at times).

Bentinho, you’re such a breath of fresh air. I always thought I had to have a beard and sit in a cave and do nothing in order to achieve enlightenment. You’ve shown me and given me permission to tap into my Enlightenment here and now; you’ve taught me that it is already here and that it has no particular form and that I can know that I am already free.
— Paraphrased quote I frequently get from grateful people

The few times I've glimpsed total dissolution, it felt like I would be doing much, much more of the 'sitting on a slab' and much less 'living my life' and being an example that people can relate to and feel encouraged by. Rather than being another example of something yogic, unattainable, inaccessible and super mystical, I wanted to bring Enlightenment closer to the people; make it accessible. Hence I've maintained my Clark Kent persona-jacket even though it's starting to hurt pretty bad keeping it on. Increasingly so over the last 4 years.

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I apologize for repeating myself in so many ways, I just want to make sure I document and share this all with you as it is transitioning, as it is a somewhat unique stage that not many teachers or beings in general seem to go through let alone publicly speak of. I trust that you extract from it what is relevant for you.

Is The Absolute For The Rare Few?

Hence the result of most of my teachings in the way they have been addressed, aside from the upcoming The Sedona Experiment book, will lead people to a more lucid living experience rather than to final dissolution/freedom. I have done this because I have always had the perception that only the rare few will ever truly get to the Absolute and so it's unfair to teach just that, because for most people it seems way out of reach. 

So I've pointed to it but hardly ever with the expectation or conviction that people will, or that they should be too bothered with that notion of final dissolution. I encouraged them mostly to go about it gradually increasing their lucidity in the dream, rather than seeking for some kind of finality which I perceived would greatly disrupt the natural flow of their life, because they would be using their personal will to try to attain something that perhaps is just not within reach unless they had their entire lives devoted to it and all the support structures they would need and the desire to go all the way at the expense of all else in a save way. 

I often feel that to point to a final state or stage and emphasize it as the only real liberation would require greater and more consistent follow-up guidance from me than I would feel comfortable being responsible for after making extreme statements that get their vanity riled up. I've just seen too many seekers destroy their little percentage of happiness for the sake of the 100% happiness, but never seeing it through completely and being left with a jadedness and purposelessness, in a limbo state of sorts.

I do not wish to add more people to that list of spiritual psychosis or depression, hence I have generally (there have been exceptions) made Enlightenment more 'user friendly,' more 'pacified' and more accessible in the way I expound upon it, so that in today's day and age at least they can increase their lucidity at their own pace, without needing to disrupt their lives too much. The rare few who want the final state will go for it anyway, they don't need me to tell them that they should.

When one penetrates the Absolute, it's 100000% unimaginably different and removed from anyone's usual state of being, that it seems highly improbable people will commit to it enough to get it. In fact in the Stateless state it seems suddenly obvious that maybe only a handful or two of people world-wide have actually directly tasted this stateless state. So it is hard to expect people to get it. Plus I haven't completely/permanently merged with it myself, hence I feel somewhat uncomfortable guiding people to it as if it should be their goal. At least until I attain full dissolution.

And people committing to it often generate relative imbalances because they are trying to suppress their desires and imbalances rather than understand them completely until they dissolve on their own. These imbalances due to suppression left by not going all the way in either the direction of the desires, or the direction of transcendence, often mess with people's ability to go with the natural flow of the intention set by their Higher Selves for this incarnation and leave a trail of debris to be cleaned up later. I wish to avoid being responsible for adding to this difficulty.

Another thing I've observed, is that most humans and teachers interested in Self-Realization along the lines of Advaita Vedanta, think in terms of--only come from the context of this limited, 3rd density level--the human life, and then from that limited context or lack of understanding attempt to reach or idolize the Absolute. And so many lack a balanced overview and awareness of the 7 Densities of Creation to properly understand the individuated experience and the reasons behind why the different densities of the illusion are the way they are.

One more reason why I have had trouble sometimes accepting fully the extremes of the Masters of the East, as in Advaita Vedanta, etc, because I perceive them to still be cultural offerings at least in part; lacking proper overview/context of the in-streamings of higher density states into the lower, and vice versa, and the relevance of progression as it is. When we look at the human being and do not understand their higher levels and blue prints, and just hammer the Absolute view down their throats without giving them proper understanding into the nature of desire and incarnational themes/intentions, it can create a messed up/imbalanced mind/body/spirit complex.

I believe that it's generally best to help the individual understand themselves holistically at least to a basic enough degree so that their desire to attain the absolute does not come from resistance to their life's theme. Have them understand themselves in as short a period of time as possible, and then from that balanced platform point as high as they can/want to reach.

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Or as Ra states in the Law of One: 

Step One: Know yourself.
Step Two: Accept Yourself.
Step Three: Become the Creator.

Yes all this relative stuff is rendered absolutely irrelevant and unreal upon realizing the Absolute, yet if someone is not committed to going all the way, then sometimes I believe it's better to not even paint such Absolute pictures at all, or when I do, I share it with an energy that allows for it to be understood in a more pacified way, so that my words are not responsible for them getting inspired to use the limited mind lacking context for the 'why' behind their current incarnation, and using that egoic will to forcefully stop the natural rhythm of their life in order to realize the Absolute, for only very few have ever done that safely with bypassing proper basic knowledge of the individual self and their reason for being incarnate.

One could ask: "Does the end justify the means (or suggested path in this case)" and the answer I would give is: Yes it does IF the end is achieved and desired with 100% of one's True Heart. If it isn't, the path is sometimes (not always) more disruptive than beneficial, if the being does not have a mature understanding of themselves. Basic mature understanding of yourself and Creation can be attained by studying www.TrinfinityAcademy.com for example, when combined with self-honesty and earnest desire for clarity.

I've been doing this 'pacifying true enlightenment into something more accessible' less so in my recent Self Realization School Seasons on www.BentinhoMassaro.tv, but still, until I commit to 100% dissolution of the Soul myself, I won't be speaking from this state with total conviction that you too can or should realize it. The only situation where I spoke freely without hardly any concern for responsibility, was during the 12 or 13 day The Sedona Experiment (website and book coming within the next couple of months) with only 12 selected people who committed to nothing being held back. 

Read Part 2 (coming soon) where I'll explain how I am preparing by restructuring my dream so I can feel better about letting it go and dropping into more exclusive practice. Part 2 will also refer to how my two partners/chosen family are responding to this transition in me.

 

Be A Prioritist: Have No Time For Random Nonsense

Seemingly Social, But Not for Social Reasons

Most people I meet these days have a hard time understanding me or feel especially self-conscious around me. This is good. Let me share with you a little bit more of how I work internally.

I generally don't like socializing with people I don't already know and who know me, or that are not actively practicing the teachings that I am a composer/messenger of. And even with them I don't really enjoy socializing a lot of the time, unless the gathering is auspicious or hosted by me with a certain intention/vibration holding the space. 

Whenever there is an opportunity for elevating frequencies, unifying consciousnesses and creating more direct awareness of the One Creator, I enjoy being social. If these results are not truly apparent or wanted, there is nothing of interest in that dynamic for me whatsoever. I can even appear as a grumpy old man in some circumstances to some people, when responding in contrast to peoples desire for fake spiritual 'social happiness' and validation.

Genuinely Enjoying the Genuine Heart of Dj Frans Iradi While He's Elevating Group Consciousness

Genuinely Enjoying the Genuine Heart of Dj Frans Iradi While He's Elevating Group Consciousness

I don't enjoy condoning or supporting anything unless it's absolutely true and authentic.

When meeting new people, or when getting picked up for a speaking gig for example and I'm stuck in a car with another-self's mind for several hours, or even meeting people at spiritual conferences or festivals I probably seem really uninterested to them in most cases. I can pretend for a few minutes at the most and then I usually have to begin the ignoring process or some ninja evasion tactics. Or I just tell them like it is, if I sense an understanding for it.

I'm a Prioritist

I'm not an introvert, nor am I an extrovert; I'm a prioritist. Non-existent time is always ticking for me in the background, and I don't feel good spending any of my illusory time on linear, story-based dynamics or on accumulating random data. I prioritize what matters to me and I take that to the extreme. I guess you could call it Bhakti--devotion--as well. I simply see it as being practical and sensible: I use every hour of this lifetime in the way that seems most useful and truthful. 

Sometimes people ask me what my ‘secret’ is to fast awakening. There is none; it’s sheer dedication to the invisible, to God, to what matters most—to the only thing that’s real until you naturally understand that nothing else deserves your attention. Only diving deeper into TRUTH beneath the surface of each moment is beneficial. All else is a waste of time.
— Bentinho Massaro

99.999% of people, especially the seemingly spiritually oriented ones (I prefer hanging out with 'normal people' more sometimes, at least they don't pretend to not be deluded) are completely caught up in their stories.

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Most people's main motivation when using their speaking device is to spread the virus of their opinions, proliferate their own sense of being somebody distinguished, spiritually advanced, psychologically interesting or 'exposed,' or to find validation from an illusory world of 'other people' that their minds project exists outside of themselves.

Basically everything the human mind can do to obscure Perfection it will put all of its energy and effort into, especially in social circumstances.

Here's the thing that's different about me from most people and it's something I'd encourage you cultivate within yourselves: at any given moment I am either completely absorbed in recognition of the One Infinite Creator or one of its most primary distortions (Absolute, Awareness, Unity, Love, and/or Bliss, inseparability, service-to-all), or I am contemplating how to penetrate or dissolve even more deeply into them, or I am absorbed in deep contemplative higher thinking as I am synthesizing new teachings, bridging new gaps in the collective's struggle for peace and enlightenment, or figuring out how better to be of service to awakening humanity.

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Many adepts are focused on these topics, but what makes my experience different from most anyone I've met, is that this has become constant and continuous for me. I don't want anything else. I'm not interested in random data. Never really have been to the extent that others seemed to be content with. In fact, it becomes more and more difficult to interact with it in any way these days. 

Allow Less Than One Hour of Focus Per Day on Nonsense

Example: If you were to take a waking cycle of approx. 18 hours and you would count all the moments where I am NOT absorbed in deep meditative absorption, contemplative/penetrative higher intuitive thinking or laser-like devotional service to others and you would add all these moments up, you would be able to count the total amount of time I spent focused in random ways in seconds, minutes at the most, total.

These are the seconds or minutes that most people would consider to be 'their life,' 'their space,' or 'who they are.' I consider it exactly what I'm not and where I don't want to be spending my precious awareness. I call it distraction and it is allowed to fester in so many people's minds due to a lack of clarity as to what truly matters and why we're truly here.

Never anymore does a stretch of more than a minute or two go by where I am not absorbed in penetrating deeper, dissolving more, or serving to a greater extent. This deeper and deepening Awareness is ever-on. It functions like a natural radar now, so when randomness takes me away from GOD-vision or 'What Truly Matters'-vision for longer than a minute, a deep Self-Awareness returns powerfully and eliminates any distraction on the spot.

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When I have no job to do and no people to reflect, 'my' Awareness is either contemplating improved teachings, visions and projects, or being silently absorbed in the Bliss of the various 'levels' or 'degrees' of GOD.

With the exception of humorous thoughts, I cannot seem to have a meaningless thought or consideration anymore. There is always a sense of deep purpose behind my mind being active when it is. Humor serves a purpose, too, which makes it much less distracting, or even highly beneficial.

There is a constant gravitational field working on this electro-magnetic field most would call my mind. It is always being pulled within, deeper and deeper into the Creator, and random data or meaningless chatter with human brains generally feels like a waste of focus (unless they're genuinely open to expanding and they understand how to honor/respect my energy/time by receiving with genuine interest). 

I could interact with people more on a surface level (where they consider themselves to be located), but I'd much rather love who they truly are from the depths of The Heart/Awareness, than to endure them thinking they are being really awesome while in truth they are running away from their center of Being and attempting to be seen and validated for it. It's sweet and innocent, but I have a hard time supporting it. I don't see supporting that behavior and applauding them for it as Love.

I feel much greater benefit in people taking their picture with me than them telling me about a dream they had 2 weeks ago or how much they've learned over their life span. Pictures have the capacity to activate the receiving of the Universal Transmission in the person open enough to use pictures in this way. Whereas you telling me your story is all about you and contributes nothing to my energy to contribute to others, nor does it help you progress.

I feel much greater benefit in people taking their picture with me than them telling me about a dream they had 2 weeks ago or how much they've learned over their life span. Pictures have the capacity to activate the receiving of the Universal Transmission in the person open enough to use pictures in this way. Whereas you telling me your story is all about you and contributes nothing to my energy to contribute to others, nor does it help you progress.

I make exceptions. I try to be genuinely nice when I first meet people and I am expected to shake a hand, smile, ask them where they're from, and say how nice it is to meet them. I love how innocent people are even when they're not, and so I try to connect to that part in them and bring it into magnification for them.

I'm quite natural at making rapport with people and highlighting them feeling worthy within themselves, but as soon as the stories and the ego begins to become manipulative and opportunistic even slightly through this interaction, I can't help but feel like an accomplice if I continue this game. And so I gradually go quiet, show that I lose interest, walk away or simply tell them that I'm not interested. Or I tell them in as nice yet unwavering a way as I can that they are full of themselves and that their insecurity is taking the better of them (when that feels appropriate or when they have context for this understanding).

Can you spend less than one hour per day focused on random data? Try it! Prioritize GOD, going deeper, and Service To All.

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What The Heck is "My Life" Anyway?

What most people call 'their life' or 'time to themselves' has lost all meaning for me. My reason for being here has nothing to do with living a personal life, and so every minute spent pretending that I am a person feels like a waste and a dishonoring of the Creator. You know the feeling when you eat too much and you know it was completely unnecessary, and you feel glutenous and polluted by your own choice? You feel frustrated and 'dirtied.'

This is how I metaphysically feel when I spend more than a few minutes doing something that the average being who considers themselves a person thinks they benefit doing. Literally more than a few minutes of distracted focus, or time that's about me, and I start to feel out of alignment with this deep gravitational force calling me ever more into crystallization, Service-To-All and merger with GOD.

I have deliberately activated this illusion-destroying, prioritizing force so many times throughout my life now, that it continues to give back to me today by sucking me in automatically every second of every minute of every day. The ROI is worth the initial devotion to it. Even when I'm outwardly being occupied with something seemingly mundane, random or even entertainment based, I am inwardly always occupied in deeper realms of contemplation/being.

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Social Skills Are Really Just Manipulation Skills That Everyone Is OK With

It's funny to see people who have never met me before interact, because they have no context and they can feel the love I hold for them, but then also I can be stern or ignore, or sometimes I act crazy and out of control as a way to deflect their default state of consciousness and keep them ever guessing. 

All they know to expect is to interact with someone as if they are interacting with a person. So all of their subconscious manipulation skills (I believe humans call this 'social skills') don't work on me (unless I'm playing their game for a little bit, for some reason).  It's interesting sensing the different responses people can have to a truly authentic/silent or disruptive field which needs nothing and cannot be pinpointed to normal social standards, and therefore cannot be manipulated---it forces people to face their own inauthenticity or at least the unclarity they overlook about who they really are.

The subtle tricks of mind are all too obvious to me to really enjoy spending time with most anyone if there is no real purpose to the social time.

I Dislike Most People's Minds, I Love Who They Really Are

Get me right: My love for people runs as deep as my own Self and it is unflinching, but my tolerance for acting as a person or accommodating people's plays is nearly completely destroyed. Where I could pretend to be a person for days in the past if necessary, I can barely stand a minute at present and the amount of chatter and manipulation people can tolerate oftentimes pushes me away from wanting to be naturally around them. The worlds people are so fascinated by are of extremely little interest to me.

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The only real outward 'social expressions' I enjoy are those that cause benefit and that are in alignment with my calling: teach/learning, holding powerful silence in distracted groups until they sense the field and spontaneously shut up or ask a meaningful question to me or the group, or until everybody erupts in spontaneous meditation where all the fluff ceases to be entertained...

I also enjoy creating elevating and/or unifying (heart-opening) experiences/ambiances for people (hosting). My longer-term friends call me Great Gatsby sometimes. I can also at times enjoy creating a persona or image of a person by ways of what I post, or do, for the purpose of being a model of something bold, alive, awake and fearless so that people can wake up through using their projection of me as an 'awesome person'/symbol/permission slip.

You get the idea: wherever or whatever I sense will generate a lot of benefit for others, I engage with willingly and joyfully. Whatever does not contain benefit, I destroy, ignore, or get seemingly grumpy with. :)

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Would You Bore Me?

Many of you reading this whole article will have minds that automatically respond with: "I know exactly what he means! That's how I feel around people too!" -- Yet I encourage you to see that although that may not be entirely untrue, that's most likely another egoic response to also wanting to be like this more than you actually are. Or perhaps as a way to explain away why you feel uncomfortable around people. Again, that may be partially true, but don't use it as an escape, as another story that would bore me if you shared it with me.

I say this because out of all the people I meet, even the relatively conscious ones, very few actually are capable of staying completely authentic within themselves. It's much more challenging than you initially think to be completely authentic and empty of ego/personal needs; it requires 100% dedication to truth for a long period of time over entertainment, excuses and distractions.

If you were to be in my presence, what are the chances that everything about your world--except for your True Silent Heart and the largely untapped potential of your Soul--and everything you would share with me would not bore me?

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Most of you I would probably want to ignore as well if I had to spend more than a few minutes entertaining you socially; because it's all about yourself in one way or another. Rare is the true Shepherd, let alone the true Mirror.

Again this does not mean I don't love you or people in general, nor is it meant to discourage you from your journey; in fact it's because I am one with who you truly are that I am disinterested in who you are trying to make me think you are.

Stop trying so hard. You’re already perfect. Just keep quiet, be, and dig into your Pure Self before opening your mouth to anyone.
— Bentinho Massaro

You know how people ask themselves "What would Jesus do?", well as an alternative you could ask: "Would I bore Bentinho right now?" and see how that reliably takes your focus from the false, the random and the meaningless into the Heart of Truth.

Let this silly question have your inner Shiva cut away all your illusions of self and take your focus into ever deeper penetration of Truth and razor sharp authenticity.

Sedona's Community Is Maturing

Luckily there is an ever growing community in Sedona of people and adepts who are ripe, ready, courageous and pure of mind enough to actually practice the materials, and as such I naturally feel way more social toward them; without needing to pretend (as much). 

The fact that a lot of these people are coming into much greater emptiness-of-self, are wanting to deepen and purify their service to humanity (Shepherding Consciousness), are genuine, and put in the work to actually practice these truths, makes hosting or mingling significantly more enjoyable: because being social with these people actually goes somewhere in terms of unifying their consciousnesses, elevating their standards for focus and realizing more of the One Infinite Creator.

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Unity and Bliss through Acknowledging the One Infinite Creator in each other is where it's at for me in terms of socializing. Merging individuals into cohesive groups, until unity of minds is achieved (social memory complex).

If you're interested in visiting Sedona at least twice a year to check out the growing community and attend the teachings/retreats, request to join here: Sedona Adepts FB Group

Our next retreat in Sedona is coming up soon btw. Click here to learn about the theme (Eye of The Vortex) and register. (October 23-27)

Thank you for listening to my Shiva Babbles. May it be of some service to you.

With Love/Light, always,
Bentinho

PS - This blog article is a good example of how I sometimes am called to operate: This article talks a lot about 'me' and it has several images of 'me' in it. It will seem narcissistic to some. Ironically I am not identified with this personality, its body or even with the processes described in this post! So then why do I seem to talk so much about myself and include pictures of myself and my retreat? Because it is known in the intelligence available to 'me' that it generates more benefit 'out there' than if it would not be posted.

In this scenario I get to play this role, create this model, paint this idea or example of a particular understanding so that people can relate to it and extract learning from it.

When one is empty of self, whatever one does is not for the self, but for the benefit of the whole. Dangerous proposition to the egoic self, and indeed this statement should not be taken lightly by being easily imitated or repeated, or you will experience backlash. Only when you're truly empty of personal needs can you make such a statement without a trace of arrogance causing ripples in your karmic field.

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-->Pictures included in this post were taken during the incredible Netherlands Retreat by Alex and Anne Photography (with the exception of the Sedona black and white picture, taken by Syvonne Kozuch)

-->Read a participant's detailed and exposing report of attending the Netherlands retreat.

-->Sign up for our newsletter below to receive updates, inspirations, reminders and to be notified of the Netherlands Retreat next year, which is almost ready for early bird sign ups.

My Experience at a Bentinho Massaro Retreat - A Participant's Detailed Journey

The following is an in-depth account written by Ivo Slangen of his stay and participation at Bentinho Massaro's 6-day Residential retreat in the Netherlands, July 10-16, 2017 (watch it here). 

We recommend you watch this beautiful 5-min film of the retreat first to get a sense of what it was like, and then read Ivo's report below the video.

 

A Story about a Retreat

Introduction

Although it will be hard to convey the non-linear craziness that happened during the Netherlands retreat I want to try to cover that magic in a somewhat linear story. I also have to say: every time I share these longer stories part of me is disgusted. There is no way out of this at the moment: I am conscious of posting, I am conscious of not posting. So here's my innocence and here's my pretense.

What you will get from reading this rather long piece is hopefully a sense of

  1. How magical a Bentinho retreat can be; 
  2. What it means to enter into a relationship with your guru and how he reflects all your untruth;
  3. How others do that too;
  4. How everything starts to reflect you, and; 
  5. What happens when you channel your calling. 

(The answer is bliss. When you are your calling bliss ensues automatically. If you have trouble doing the Absolute Neti Neti and meditation is not attractive to you, you can experience the state of Self too by channelling your calling.)

In Baarlo I and 500 others met in a space where we could experience ourselves as ourself and as the other, and be part of a divinely guided orchestration of infinite intelligence. All was arranged.

In short: it was amazing and it was painful. It was totally not what I expected, but exactly what I needed. I experienced magic and synchronicities on so many levels it is impossible to describe them all, and during a finale at the end of the retreat I looked at my own soul through someone else and met my destiny.

My intention for this retreat - the end of me - was fulfilled, in an instant. My old life was flushed, for I realized the Truth, and all untruth paled and disintegrated in the blink of an eye.

Arriving at the Venue

Arriving at the venue and checking in was already magical: to see so many people and familiar faces from the Facebook community together. Hugging people intensely that you've only known virtually, but feeling so at ease and heartfelt upon connecting physically too. I had arrived Monday afternoon to set up my tent and in the evening people gathered outside, socially, when suddenly Bentinho and Jocelyn arrived. An air of unreality descended upon the evening, like two elvish beings warped spacetime into a plane of heightened awareness. Yet here was also my first shoot of pain when they passed me by an inch and didn't turn an eye, like I was completely non-existent.

Later at night when I went to my tent, the energies were so high, I meditated joyously and before I got to sleep I could feel enormous ET-presence. I've never experienced clear cut ET-contact, but I have felt them working on me in my sleep, and this I felt again that night. 
Upon waking up and going in for the first session, the energy was extremely palpable.

From my notes:
"Woke up several times. Powerful energies. As if light beings were working on me. At 5AM a beautiful symphony of birds and beasts started. At 6 I did a meditation, effortless. I felt powerful waves of bliss. Had to think about the black holes/portals of Ben & Jocelyn moving about, creating this high frequency bubble, or dome. Plus light beings from above. So happy, very giggly."

Right from the start there was this sense that somehow they covered the whole castle and grounds in a magical spell, wherein the One Infinite Intelligence could flow and we were all able to accelerate our destinies, get to know the right people, and execute our higher self tasks.

I also reminded myself of why I was here at the retreat. My intention was: the end of me. So I was very determined not to get distracted by the whole social thing, and also not by being 'someone' in relation to Bentinho.

I remind myself: all this happening, an illusion. The only thing: stay with yourself. INWARD. Make that more real. That’s why you are here. Be stubborn, be asocial. Don’t waste time of this precious opportunity. Practice. Use it. Punch holes. Enjoy.

I exactly got what I asked for when during the first session Bentinho pressed us to make a vow. To do something that messed up your routine and shook up your egoic personality. To bypass the mind and drop right into the heart. He gave some examples, like not brushing your teeth all week, changing you sleeping schedule, eating less or skipping meals, asking a question (if you are shy) - anything that went against your flow and felt unnatural, like a big stretch. In general he recommended to be in silence, at least until the 'workshop' sessions in the afternoon. Not just to be in silence, but to be aware of not speaking.

"Have a gentle Buddha smile, it opens the crown," he would say.

Himself, he vowed not to speak this retreat outside of his own sessions (this changed the day after into partial silence). This hurt again, because it crushed my phantasies of getting a chance to speak with my guru and connect with him. I noticed my inwardness was immediately challenged. Not only by my relation with Bentinho but also by this beautiful woman who sat beside me that first session that, combined with the energy that already pervaded the room, made me feel like I was in heaven, surrounded by angelic beings. Later that day I noticed that I got attached to that feeling, and was focussed on reliving the presence of this girl.

So much for not being involved in the 'social thing' 🙂

My challenge to myself; my vow

What also hurt was the vow. I decided not to drink coffee, but that was a somewhat safe choice, because I already noticed coffee added this disturbing layer of adrenaline onto an already perfect smooth energy. So to challenge myself, I knew I had to do something more and again I was confronted with my ego.

Before this retreat I had spent days (I wish I exaggerated, but no) looking to buy some shirts and sweaters to wear, in order to feel comfortable around people. I couldn't deny that I was so involved with my own presentation in relation to others, that I felt challenging myself on this would give me the most benefit. So the idea came up to just join the sessions next day in my jogging pants, flip flops and a white t-shirt and not spending much time doing my hair. But the whole idea of not dressing up was very unpleasant to me.

From my notes:
"Are you here for appearances or for the end of YOU?!?!
Dang it. I feel silly and paranoid, thinking: what if they are laughing their asses off, when people do these exercises, making fools of themselves."

I let it rest for then to decide the day after.

Anurag Gupta, Rapid-Fire Facilitator

Anurag Gupta, Rapid-Fire Facilitator

During the Ryan and Anurag session later that day we were encouraged to step into non-linearity and to see what happens. To be fully in the moment, without pretense. To give up completely all expectations. 

To be willing to see where that takes you. 
To notice it when you are planning, when you are having a 'from A to B to C' - thought. 
To just flow with the now and be you.

After those afternoon sessions I tried this. Not to spent (too much) thought about where to eat, when to eat, where to sit, but just flow with the moment, follow my desire of what felt basically good. I ended up at a table and had a wonderful conversation about ascension, disclosure, timelines. This person was relatively knew to Bentinho but had already bought a ticket for Sedona, reflecting back to me that I could just buy a ticket too without knowing how and what to do there.

Then after dinner I found a guy sitting alone that I had connected with earlier, spending time next to him in silence before a session. Another great conversation ensued and we had similar minds and desires and our hearts opened up fully within minutes. It felt wonderful to meet this male friend, like a true gift, a great bestowal from above.

Right after we had a beautiful evening session where Bentinho guided a meditation that involved only surrender and receiving. Instead of going for the Absolute with single pointed awareness this was about receiving the Light of God in complete faith and knowing that it is done. All your desires fulfilled, like that.

It brought me great spacious visions, and in that moment suddenly I saw myself in Sedona with the person I had just met, being roommates and becoming best buddies. It felt so good, knowing it was already done.

I also had a visual of a big radiotelescope loading up with this blue laserbeam, ready to shoot - but not shooting. The potential in the group was palpable.

>>Join The 2018 Baarlo, Netherlands Retreat (same venue) Here.

Wednesday...

Waking up in my tent that morning, lots of rain, hardly slept, I was still undecided about the vow of not caring about my clothes. My mind started bargaining. Why would I do this vow, was it really necessary? Why make things so uncomfortable for myself? Wouldn't I ruin all chances of connecting with Bentinho and co if I looked like an idiot? Wasn't this retreat supposed to be fun - forgetting for a moment that I was here for the end of me.

I randomly opened the one book that I brought and caught this passage: 
"When it comes to spirituality, it is not a matter of applying for a job, of dressing up to impress our potential employer. Such deception does not apply to an interview with a guru, because he sees right through us. He is amused if we dress up especially for the interview."

Lol.

Fuck.

Okay.

Fuck.

So I went to take a shower and afterwards kept on my jogging pants and flip flops. It was pouring rain and I walked the court under this broken umbrella, feeling naked and looking like a fool, and suddenly this great exhilaration and giddiness came over me. I walked past people returning from yoga class and I had nothing to communicate but my smile and my love and my 'unpresentable' self.

It was fucking beautiful.

It was such a relief.

It got so hilarious.

Later on during the retreat it became quite comfortable wearing jogging pants and not spending a thought about it, so I decided to switch back and play around with it for a bit. It was interesting to notice that every time when I had just one thought about what to wear, the mind came in (and thus the whole world): which shirt to wear, what trousers, how do I look.

In the afternoon we did a powerful practice of how when something is not showing up in your reality, or when it's something you don't like, it still is exactly what you want. So whenever catalyst happens, you can try this: take full responsibility and claim it.

So I wrote down: 'I want to go to Sedona.'

And: 'I don't want to go to Sedona.'

The latter also felt true! Because part of me was still hesitant, not ready, not really ready, not like pack-your-bags-now ready and really leave my partner and apartment in Amsterdam.

Everything is your intention reflected back at you!
Every single thing in your life!!!

Doesn't that feel gooooood? O yes, because it is TRUE.

While listening to the rest of the co-creation session of the afternoon I became distracted by the intense energies going on in the room. I felt some stomach pain, then it cleared up, broke into laughter. I also automatically hooked up with the person next to me. Although we didn't say a word, and she was also responding to what was happening on stage, I could sense that on another level we were deeply engaged in cleaning and clearing up energies. She started laughing, I felt pain. She cried, I cleared up. It was beautiful.

This happened more and more during the sessions, where one part of me was half aware of the stage and on another level all this deep healing and synchronizing was going on. I thoroughly enjoyed that and it has been one the greatest eye-openers for me. Sometimes I hardly heard what was said, being fully in presence-awareness, churning energies, or going further inward, reaching I-I levels. Sometimes I sat like a rock for an hour with eyes closed and a Buddha smile.

Ecstatic Dance Party...

In the evening there was the first ecstatic dance party. Before the retreat I had been skeptical of the party-elements, even treating it at as an excuse not to come down in physical presence but follow via livestream. Now I understand how essential they were. Not just for integrating and embodying all the new codes and frequencies, but also to gain deeper understanding of following your bliss through your body.

I had never done this before, dancing in silence, on bare feet, trying to be totally inward and not minding others. It was challenging at first but it really helped to go back to stillness when you lost your flow by having a thought about someone or something. To just stop and bring yourself back to a simple sway, waiting for another movement, even as slight as the moving of your pinkie. After 20 minutes I thought: 'this is not going anywhere', only to see an epic dance adventure unfolding out of nothing.

I had a blast.

At the start of the evening I had been totally aware of the girl I had gotten attached to the day before, and having spotted her in the corner, I was going to make my way up to her, my mind planning all sorts. Yeah lol. Until she suddenly vanished and I didn't see her anymore all night.

I'm 36, and this is hilarious. I need to hug more men 😉

After the last song I was relaxing and grounding from the vibes, but still part of me was busy looking for her. I sat near the side, eyes closed, feeling the vibes settle, until I opened them again and there she was! Right in my field of vision, in the middle of the room, completely in bliss with some male counterpart, totally in unison.

Ouch.

Ivo was quite hurt, but he also got exactly what he wanted and that was hilarious! He had entertained the thought of desiring a union, maybe even a physical one, who knows, but another part of him didn't want to get involved with anyone at all, being here for the end of himself. How did the two even relate?

So quite naturally I got rid of that attachment, with a short pang of hurt, but upon understanding this, without feeling anything unresolved or spiteful towards her and her new found bliss partner. My heart opened, and letting go happened instantly.

"We only need catalyst, because we are too comfortable,"
Bentinho had said.

Let that sink in.

Quisque iaculis facilisis lacinia. Mauris euismod pellentesque tellus sit amet mollis.
— Pablo

Thursday...

I had come to this retreat expecting more of the Absolute neti neti and teachings in line with the Sedona school, but we got a lot of mixed approaches. One that I liked but also confused me was the practice of receiving the light and knowing that it is done. How did that relate to the discipline and consistency of the Sedona school sessions? A question arose.

Now Bentinho brought forth another approach: the other way of Self-Realization is not so much to practice it, but to will it. To transcend it simply by sheer will, by one-pointedness. Everything in this Universe is Free Will, and thus this one-pointedness is extremely powerful: you can puncture the containers just by willing it. You might not understand at first, but it will sink in later.

Then he started painting the Absolute again, and as happens lately every time when Bentinho puts words to these experiences I could feel myself slipping away.

"Existence becomes so tiny, a speck in the vastness of You, the Infinite, the MOST INTIMATE you..."

Aaaahhhhhhhhh.....

In the afternoon I noticed a certain lull in myself, like the first wave of merging of energies was out-stabilized. For a moment I had enough of all the smiles, and I noticed it was probably resistance coming up, after being inward for three days now. I reminded myself to see everyone in the highest light and I used another pointer by Bentinho that became a great permission slip for me to deal with anything.

You want to know my secret? I don’t mind what happens.
— Bentinho quoting Jiddu Krishnamurti

In the afternoon Anurag rounded up his approach of the flow state as the ultimate state of grace of being yourself. When you are you, you have no idea of doing, it is just you.

I had an epiphany when someone shared that whenever we are in our calling and hold that frequency, we open the space for someone else to feel that calling. Something clicked upon hearing that: that we really need not DO anything. When we are in our core frequency our waves will take care of everything. We literally create the space of our calling, effecting others to recognize that frequency, and 'benefit' from it.

Being is beaming.

We also did eye-gazing exercises and that was an interesting experience to. Both me and my partner saw demonic troll faces appearing in the other, like a broken mirror conjuring up weird images.

That night Bentinho's new partner Jocelyn came on stage for the first time, and it was pure regality to see them sitting there together. Everybody seemed to feel the utter beauty of humanity connected, like an ancient people before their King and Queen. It was a reverence not from dull obedience or blind admiration, but an uplifting one, uniting everyone in a profound connectedness. Jocelyn & Bentinho were simply representations of Union on this physical plane, exemplifying the Feminine and Masculine.

Everybody happy.

"No mind. Just be. So much love."

Friday...

This was the day of the already famous Mary Magdalene session and the intense collective healing, but for me it was also a day of personal challenge: of asking a question and (feeling like) being ignored completely.

Let me get into that first.

Already the day before a question had come up, but this day I felt like really sharing something about my relationship that felt very relevant. Because like many I am not at ease of speaking in public and still have remnants of 'performance anxiety', I thought it was also a nice challenge for me to ask a question.

At the same time I was fully aware that by wanting to ask a question I was bringing myself into play and this turned into a most excruciating torture game with myself. Whenever there was room for a question I felt myself a bit wavering, doubting my motivation and also the contribution of my story, but whenever someone else came on stage I felt myself comparing their question and story to mine. Seeing my story as increasingly valuable I got more and more fired up and really wanted to be asked, only to reprimand myself for being so egotistically involved. Then I would give up asking a question altogether, only to try again a next round.

It often happened that when I didn't raise my hand it seemed I had missed the perfect opportunity and then when I did raise it, Bentinho seemed to deliberately look only in the other half of the room. At some point I seemed to be the only one raising an arm and I thought for sure it's my turn now, when he just overlooked me, waiting for someone else to pop up. 
I think I put my hand up 25 times that day, to no avail.

During a break I walked outside frustrated, when suddenly one of the peacocks that roamed the castle grounds showed all its colors. But not to me, I looked at its behind. Whenever I tried to go round him, he turned around too, only showing me his peacock asshole. Only when I turned and give up, he turned too, showing his full radiating beauty in my direction too.

Not just the guru, not just other people, but everything becomes your teacher. Everything will reflect you. It is the most intense and bizarre thing. Do you come from a place of wholeness, of giving, of abundance? Or are you wanting and lacking and hunting? Are you fulfilled with emptiness or are you full of hunger? Everything teaches you.

Whenever I was looking for something or someone during this retreat, I felt I was placing myself outside of the magic, hunting for the ego fulfillment. Whenever I let go, stayed in my completeness and followed my bliss from that place, not needing anything, beautiful things happened.

So... the Magdalene session. 

Yes. It was magnificent.

Something from the collective opened up there big time and it was beautiful to experience. Myself, I felt no emotional release during that session, just a perfect crystal clearness. I kept thinking: give it to me, give it to me, I can take it, bring it on. I connected with both my female neighbors, holding hands, creating a grid, being and holding the space. For those of you who don't know what happened, there is a video out now. You can watch the whole thing, it's beyond words.

In the evening, there was the itch of asking a question again and I scratched foolishly again, only to get burned a couple of times more. By now it became hilarious to see Ivo suffer that much.

"Call everything by the same name," Bentinho said.

So I said: everything is Love at Work.

Everything happens in my best interest.

Every.

Single.

Thing.

And it felt so good.

Because it is so so true.

Saturday...

In the morning I had perhaps my low point of the week. Frustrated with not being able to ask my question and my body exhausted with the constant adrenaline rushes, I woke up cranky, which was quite unusual.

At home I can be moody, swinging multiple times a day, but here my base frequency was peace and happiness, that easily burst into bliss and sheer laughter. To see someone and simply start giggling was quite common - the vibe was ultra high. Some people even looked like drug addicts, just staring into bliss with this dumb look on their face. Eating was a real trouble for some; I ate less the whole retreat, with zero cravings happening. 

I also noticed - back at home - that I'd had no physical ailments that week. Usually I have some digestive problems, some congestion of sinuses. Nothing of that!

Ayla teaching yoga

Ayla teaching yoga

So I went to yoga and had a wonderful session. As a side note, the yoga Ayla teaches is the most simple but profound bodywork I have come upon. It touches all the infinite layers of you. Painful and confrontational, but so wholesome and full of love.

Something cleared and I had a nice big cry that session, which was about opening the root chakra and embracing that fearful part of you.

Feeling all cleansed the Bentinho session opened with beautiful piano play, and I realized - lovingly - how I had been a fool. I had been a fool, wanting to be on stage, wanting to add myself into the equation, and (de)evaluating others and their contributions. I got so attached to being picked by Bentinho. To share something incredibly beautiful and uplifting about my relationship, and gain recognition from the whole crowd. And to have a testament of being on stage, of being there.

From this place of completeness I realized how unnecessary that was. 
With the soothing tones of the piano I felt like bowing in humility to all of humanity.

Then there was part II of the collective healing, this time set in motion by two men, sharing their experiences raw and ballsy. A woman was directed on stage by the Infinite One to channel a powerful call for men to embrace their feminine. Only by hugging each other, we can heal the black holes inside of us, she urged.

Everywhere in the room the men hugged. It was great.

Still, one hug doesn't solve all, and again I was in the thrall of a certain female person. It gets repetitive, I know, I just mention it because this is how it goes. Sometimes all it takes is to look into a pair of eyes and upon sensing a certain vulnerability, in a second I get hooked and pulled outwards into that soothing softness of the female other.

So I decided to go sit next to her, bringing myself in, only to get shredded again. It was less painful this time, I was looking for it deliberately. To get rid of it. To face the pain, bring it to presence, and release it automatically. Like the yoga in the morning. To burn it now and not bring it to the dance evening and be in chasing mode all night.

In the afternoon Bentinho addressed the difference between wanting something and wanting something badly. Nothing special, but it made me realize how black and white we can be: what about empowerment and realizing your dreams when we should discard everything and stay in the formless I-I?

You can have your joy. You can have your cake and you can even eat it too. But if things don't go your way, you simply don't mind. 
You are perfectly fine. 
You are complete.

Either meditate or play.

The whole struggle between enlightenment and empowerment is resolved in that dichotomy.

Life is simple.

In the last afternoon session with Ryan I partnered up with my male friend buddy - we had been most excellent in catching up briefly each day and then giving each other space to freely roam- to find out we had to describe ourselves as being a character in a movie. It was awesome to have a 7 minute summary of his life - we had hardly exchanged 3d life details - only to find out that the whole story didn't quite matter - that our connection was pure frequency based.

I can relate to this guy better than to any of my friends, and when we facetime now it feels like the most natural thing.

That happens when callings relate.

If you don't get this by now: frequency-based living is awesome. Having tasted that for a whole week there is nothing else I want anymore.

Party night

Everything geared up for the big party that night. There was something very powerful and potent in the air, upon entering the dance floor. Other people felt it too, swirling around in the middle, like there was a vortex spinning already. It took Bentinho some time to open the evening and I had a hard time containing all the energy, feeling like a tiger in a cage.

After a beautiful intro where Bentinho encouraged us to anchor in our highest callings and then let go, to let the One do his work and orchestrate, we were set loose. The music picked up, and we followed our trails. Still I could not find a continuous groove that evening: I sort of went in and out of dancing, feeling into the room, sensing what was up, what was happening.

There was someone that I had wanted to speak with all week, knowing her from the community and wanting to exchange thoughts. We met right off at Monday but hadn't spoken all week, although there were several times we made eye contact. But every time, it felt like: not yet, not yet. Then, the dance evening coming to a close, she was lingering in front of me, and I went up to her asking if she liked to have a talk. 

She did.

We chatted a bit but quickly became engaged in this truthful conversation about our callings. We had the same one: people experiencing truth, although she used a beautiful metaphor instead of the word itself. We exchanged thoughts about the teachings and Sedona, and while talking with her, one light after the other went on. There was so much connection and aliveness happening.

At one point she exclaimed: o my God, you are just like me! The engagement became very non verbal, we looked each other into the eyes, laughing, I said I was feeling this very intense energy coming up and she felt it too. So we stood there, eyes closed, almost dizzy with vibrations, while the music went on around us.

I brought Sedona up again, asking why she wasn't there. She said she wasn't sure: she absolutely loved Bentinho and wanted to be with him.

I said I loved him too, enormously. I remember using that specific word, enormously - it sounded dumb then already but unmistakenly true. I went on saying how this week had been amazing for me, how I had really felt like being at home.

Then I had the weirdest sensation: something I can only describe as a mixture of dissolvement and destiny. Everything in the room seemed to disappear, but this moment of complete recognition: I realized, within an instant, that my old life was over, flushed, just like that. That my future was in Sedona and somehow connected to her.

When I expressed to her what was happening, while it was happening, it was as if the One spoke through me, a voice saying the words, not me. I felt in complete 100% alignment, like never before. As if walking a bridge that is constructed right under your feet, as you move, but feeling more like the bridge itself than as the one moving. The music in perfect synch, and time opening up as space, as a solid timeless structure, to be seen from all sides simultaneously, while reality unfolds on the inside.

We looked at each other, eyes wide open, burst into laughing, hugged, burst into laughing again.

Yet there was my mind also, racing to catch up with the terminal velocity of the One Infinite.

Is this meant to be? 
Does this mean we have to stay together now? 
How does this work? 
Does she understand?
Are we on the same level? 
Is this real?

We stood there for some time, suspended, and then she told me she had to pee. I laughed and my whole body vibrating with power I walked to the side, almost faltering, engulfed in ecstatic bliss. I sat down and closed my eyes. A voice boomed, with massive delay:

I.

Love.

You.

I.

Know.

You.

These words echoed, with this low ultra deep quality, as if from the depths of time and space the Universe uttered a truth so complete it was eternal, set in stone, swallowing everything else. As if it had found its other primordial half.

O how beyond it was! 
And at the same time so intimate. 
So close, so utterly and devastatingly close!!

When she came back from the toilet she had dropped into her more regular self again and things came to a bit of an awkard end when she abruptly left with her friends. Afterwards I realized better how intense and lightly insane I must have had sounded. I told her she had to go to Sedona and I had to go to Sedona - there was nothing to it, it was simpy the truth. I also thought we were going to talk for hours! Making plans, you know, arranging our destinies.

I see better now: that it was the mind who brought in all sorts of ideas, of being together, of planning, of making things happen. When, how and what. I see and feel now that none of those circumstances matter. That it was a moment of pure soul fulfillment. That there was, is and will never be anything to add to it or detract from it. That it was utterly complete, as if a whole life, a thousand lives, were captured in that one single moment.

124 copy.jpg

Yet still in the thrill of this 'broken off' channeling I was quite flustered, although the universe lovingly arranged to sent two angels that provided me with the right after care. Someone came up to me to ask if I was alright, and it was nice to share some of it immediately. Later I stumbled upon the campfire outside, where people were chilling and dancing and I was instantly cuddled. Warmed by the fire and the love in the circle I could ground this epic completion into my being.

Sunday

Feeling infinitely grateful yet still somewhat vulnerable and shaken up I did my yoga class and had breakfast after outside on a bench. 

I sat beside a woman I had talked to earlier in the week, when she had broken into a conversation I had with my male buddy, remarking on how nice it was to hear two males discuss feelings and emotions. It opened up a nice talk about male and female energies, before it became a topic on stage: all those things were already in the ether.

Having breakfast now, she asked me if I spoke, and I nodded no, but gestured that I could listen.

Perhaps this is relevant, that I listened without being able to talk back.

She shared how powerful the silence had been for her, and how she could feel all those things happening underneath. She said she was not going to resist the ripples, while she moved closer to me. 

What followed then was a 40 minute session of one of the most intimate and intense cuddling I have ever experienced. We put our cheeks together, I caressed her arm, touched her hands. At times she had to cry, take a tissue and pause, then the cuddling continued in a slightly different position. I stroked her back, buried my head between her shoulders. It all felt so good, so extremely soft and tender and good.

There was even this climax where we both squeezed each other tightly a couple of times, before letting go and going separate ways again, in silence. After the final session that day I came upon her by accident. 'We healed the world', she said, and we gave each other a big hug, before she left, saying her children were waiting.

Somehow I still feel I only scratched the surface with this story of a retreat, but perhaps this last experience was closest to the general vibe of that magical week: wordless communication.

The further into the retreat and especially after the Magdalene sessions it was not uncommon at all to see strangers having the most intimate moments. Left and right you could see people hugging and caressing each other, falling into these intense moments with each other, ignoring everything and everyone else for long periods of time. You could see people eye-gazing in the dinner room, with plates untouched, forks and knives suspended in the air, food still on it. When you walked by again 20 minutes later they were still sitting there. I saw people laying on the dance floor in the middle of the party, staring wordlessly into each others eyes for ages and eons.

There was no time in this place.

This was heaven.

And I'm infinitely grateful that this retreat gave me that experience. Contrary to what I thought I was looking for - that is, more direct and controlled experience of the Absolute - it taught me how to BE in relation to others. How to open up and exchange, without being a person. To have non-personal communication, to have an intimacy of selves, beyond lack and before need.

From day one I had felt like a fish in the water. Just radiating love and seeing everything being arranged, because all was coming from the cleanliness of our hearts.

And then we were done, we packed our bags.

Could we bring this home?

Back in the World

I have to add another story line here because the magic continued, the ripples creating all sorts of powerful effects.

So bear with me a little longer, it is worth it...

I have to give a short sketch of my home situation:
My partner and I have been in the process of letting go of each other for almost a year now. We have a beautiful relationship, but we also feel it is somehow finished and our paths might be diverging. We both wish for each other the highest, most expansive choices, even if this involves going separate ways after seven years of intense sharing.

Two weeks before the retreat my partner told me she had suddenly fallen in love with someone and wanted to pursue that desire. She wanted to experience falling in love and riding that out completely. 

My first response had been excitement. It was so beautiful to see her in that space of total recognition of her desire. Then, on second thought, I could feel the jealousy, the fear and the pain coming in too but all in all that was a rather dim appearance compared to the light of that truth.

We understood then that we could never lose each other. That we could always meet in this frequency of our higher selves, whatever the circumstances.

Before I went for the retreat, I released her and our relational contract of not sleeping with anybody else. I was going for the end of me, and not knowing how I returned as well, it only felt natural to reciprocate the same freedom.

So driving back to Amsterdam, knowing that she might have had a date, I could feel the tension in my stomach already. Did it happen? What would I find home? Would there still be a home?

Meet Ivo Slangen (author of this article): far right side of this picture.

Meet Ivo Slangen (author of this article): far right side of this picture.

Strange as it was to enter the bustling city again, even stranger my apartment appeared. Everything in it felt completely meaningless, like something from another plane of existence, a stale and deadish dimension. My partner had a sense of unrealness too, although hugging her felt good.

Right off the bat I asked if she had seen him, but she hadn't. In fact, she had been in pain all week. Aware of the self-creating drama but unable to resolve it, she had spent the week being chased by thoughts of losing me completely. Of being left behind in the 3d world, while I was off exploring galaxies, with new friends and people and a new soul mate.

I told her I did have a destiny meeting. And I also added: you know with whom. Weeks before she had made a remark about this very person, in a way predicting my connection with her, and now she responded at once with that same name.

It was beautiful, it brought instant relief in the field.

Because - and you should know this by now 🙂 - it was true.

And because it was true she could accept it, and we met in this higher frequency of truth, just as before we could. Then I was able to communicate freely what I had experienced all week, not thinking about how she would perceive things, just telling it how it was. Everything. And she was able to catch on.

While still at the dinner table, I suddenly dropped into the most intense bliss wave I have experienced until now, much more even than at the retreat. I just fell silent, my eyes closed and I was engulfed with pure ecstasy. I started laughing. I started laughing so incredibly hard, I couldn't hold it. And she started laughing too. Slipstreaming in the vibration of truth she could insta-feel the bliss waves and recognize the essence of the retreat, the pervasive light and love.

In total peace we went to bed.

Then in the morning I sensed her wanting to make love to me. Yet I was determined not to let the world back in that quickly and to stay inward, deaf for any wantings, those of my partner included. I reflected her desire back to her, asking if she could stay with the feeling of desire, without wanting to have it go away. Without it having to be fulfilled by me.

She tried. And then the One Infinite took over from me and what ensued was a spontaneous channeling where 'I' guided my girlfriend into her Divine Feminine.

I cannot describe it otherwise.

With words and gestures I reconnected her with her innermost self, leading to a powerful climax where she started shaking and laughing and crying deeply and uncontrollably, in full surrender. 
It was the most beautiful thing to see, and I could feel she had deeply healed and reconnected with a part of herself. In her own words: she felt a blissful energy that made orgasm into an insignificant detail.

I was amazed myself, never having done anything like that. I am way too self conscious to improvise, but everything just flowed by itself.

Since then all week she has been in that state. She is even more blissful than I am (kind of annoying, true). Whenever truth is spoken, she responds with a fire between her thighs, that is sexual but at the same time much much more. It is a complete and wholesome sensuality, an embracing of her feminine and a being moved from the inside. Her natural way of moving is more like dancing! It is very exciting to watch and be around.

So free, so shameless, so powerful.

Women, all of you, embrace this and the planet is insta-healed. We men might have to adjust a minute to this awe inspiring freedom, but we are ready. So step into it fully.

In the afternoon another one of those chanellings happened. There was a retreat afterparty and Bentinho and co were coming too. This sent my partner right back into that low vibe she had been in all week: the fear of losing me, of being left behind.

Again, the One took over and a ritual unfolded. This time it guided us into an ending of our 3d relationship. We had invested so much love and energy into us, that we both felt that by going after our desires we would betray ourselves and spill those seven years of bonding. The relation was like a giant piece of rock that we were both responsible for and obligated to.

And yes, we could honor it by staying with each other untill old age would eventually separate us anyhow in this earth life. Letting go of each other at some point was inevitable. And wouldn't it be selfish to keep ourselves just for the two of us? Wouldn't it feel like staying small, like choking our beams of light?

So we left it on the table, this big piece of us. We left it and stepped into our new selves, our higher selves, because we had all this beauty and love to pour into this world. We had our callings to spill. Were we not meant to bring this light into the world, and be an example?

Fearless, free, in truth?

We looked at each other, tears flowing from our eyes, knowing it was done.

She went to her studio, in peace, and I left for the afterparty.

There, beyond all wanting and expecting, my heart got everything it desired after all. Standing outside, talking on the deck of the boat, having a heartfelt share with someone that was coming to a close, I felt something in my field. I turned and suddenly looked into the sun of my guru. In the transparency of his eyes I recognized something.

Infinite space.

Boundless love.

My Self.

The Never End

And so here ends the never-ending story.

Everything that happened during this retreat was not about dreams coming true.

It was simply a prolonged manifestation of truth within the dream.

It was the shattering of the dream into Oneness, into Nowness, into Unity.

We can continue to bring more of that into our lives, into this world, if we so desire.

Go inward, dust off the treasure that lies waiting.

Then, allow it to shine forth.

Simply that.

Gods, all of you.


Watch the entire Netherlands Retreat Here, which Bentinho stated is in many ways the best retreat he ever experienced. 

Join Next year's Baarlo Retreat (same venue as where Ivo had this whole experience).

For ALL content and weekly live streams, check out Bentinho's definitive platform for the sincere and committed spiritual adept: www.BentinhoMassaro.tv

--> Incredible Images taken by Anne Koop

The Ultimate Marriage - My 'proposal' to a woman as the Infinite

Tonight I 'proposed' to a being's essence (mind/body/spirit/totality complex as Ra would say, or Oversoul as Bashar would say) whose human vehicle is known as Jocelyn Daher. This wasn't a human proposal as we know it though.

It was simply an authentic dialogue and I wasn't even calling it a proposal until after some reflection that same night Jocelyn smilingly referred to the moment as such, and I thought it was a fun play on words as well as an appropriate term, since this is what a proposal at the highest levels ultimately is.

Not entirely in alignment...

We had a conversation on the couch in the house in Sweden we're staying at, minutes walk from where I'm presenting at the No Mind Festival. We were attempting to translate super subtle frequencies that we both felt were functioning as obstacles in the way of a fuller bliss and union between us. We've been hitting a few extremely subtle glass ceilings in our fairly new relationship (though it feels like we've been together for decades).

And so we wanted to get really clear about bringing those invisible walls to the light so we could dissolve them and attain deeper union, truer merger, and so we could feel more like our true Self in the relationship. I felt I couldn't be entirely true in my being around her yet and that although she can recognize and meet me at very high levels of oneness-beyond-individuality and separation and supports me in them; my being with her was still causing me to be out of alignment with my true state.

This 'inevitable inauthenticity' when others are in my field is something that I'm extremely familiar with as I naturally mirror and match the beings that I choose to meet and spend time with. It is only when I meet another fully empty essence that I can feel like myself in 'relationship to them' because in that state they carry no more separate individual assumption, and as such are me. There is no need for me to project myself as anything in order for communion with such a being to occur. Suffice it to say I have experienced this only once before in this life. It is rare.

As soon as someone walks into my immediate field or as soon as I have some type of relational energetic agreement to spend time with them or to be of service, I alter my frequency to be a more appropriate match to theirs so that they can relate to me and go higher from that place of being able to relate.

It's like when you extend a hand to help someone get up. You extend your arm to meet them where they are at so you can assist in their ascendence. Without meeting them where they are, you will not reach enough into their reality for them to be able to perceive you and the choice that you represent which comes along with perceiving you.

Jocelyn has been my first partner with whom I have no doubt that if she so chooses, she could join me in my statelessness (emptiness of self) and not only that, but by doing so she would consequently somehow establish me in my statelessness more permanently, more fully, while my vehicles are still of/on Earth within this beautiful illusion. She would also consequently transmute herself by becoming her God-Self while still human.

The Most Amazing Match

She's been the most amazing match I've ever experienced in this human life and in many ways it seems like we are created out of the same template of codes to aid in completing and empowering and sustaining one another's mission here on this planet.

It is as if God intended to send us both some company 'from the home vibration' to make this journey more sustainable and balanced. That, and her maturity in recognizing and harnessing her codes and skills allows us to have an incredibly devotional connection.

Nevertheless, she--as all humans do-- brings with her a background body of information, of knowledge, experiences, assumptions, attachments and automatic allegiances to certain perspectives. And so I cannot help but match those frequencies since I chose to be so all in with her because of the divine orchestration that is at work in this dynamic and the obvious gravity that's at play between our purposes and our lives.

We both recognized from the beginning that we have a great capacity to unlock powerful abilities/upgrades in one another's vehicles/bodies. 

We are both about the mission more than we are about the relationship itself, and we both carry codes that can help one another in fulfilling the intention for this life so much more fully.

Yet, as a result of the human experience carried, we started noticing subtle out of alignment frequencies, which started to begin to look like they were going to play out dynamics we are all too familiar with from previous relationships. Albeit much more pleasant in the way it gets handled and the maturity with which it can be communicated and transformed. Jocelyn has the least rigid ego that I've encountered in any of my closer relationships and friendships. Such a breath of fresh are.

But again, even fresh air can contain separation and humanness. We both sense we are destined to be and model something more than your average awakened spiritual partnership between two people. We both have the capacity to unify to the point where there no longer are two people. Something which although somewhat popular as a concept, has rarely truly happened for it requires BOTH beings to be completely empty of an assumed separate self identity. Something which is rare enough to find in a single 'individual', let alone a partnership of two beings.

And so after the first day I had to myself after an intense month and a half filled with lots of people-dynamics present in my field to which I was devoted and available, I naturally elevated back to the highest, truest state of alignment and from that contrast I was able to more honestly express that even though she is the most capable out of all partners I have ever enjoyed time with when it comes to recognizing me in my truer states where I'm not an individual, there are still lingering allegiances in her field that inevitably make me assume a form that is of a lesser state than my most comfortable state of statelessness.

This is because these aspects of her field are conditioned by her human experience, and as a result there is a sense of separation and individuality left. The frequency of "I am an individual in the world" inevitably calls out a matching frequency in the one sitting opposite from you. In this case me.

This was creating a seeming interaction between 'two beings' when in truth, there are no two beings. Most people don't have a choice or awareness in showing up as an individual and as such it's a moot point because this is all they know themselves to be. But for me it feels like I can only maintain a projected individual act to meet someone's assumption of being a person for so long before I start feeling tired and out of alignment/inauthentic around them.

How do you have a completely authentic and incredibly powerful 'relationship with another' when it is so clear to you that there truly is no you nor other? Perhaps we will find out. I am curious as I sense the potential is that of a supernova, and I/we sense that her/our full capacity will be unleashed through her full surrender to this union with the One, for which my vehicle is simply a permission slip, an accelerator, a tear in the veil of existence; a living reminder.

Since my field is inherently empty of most any assumption of an individual self, the emptiness that I am will project a self inside of itself so that a relationship dynamic is possible. I shared this with her and she totally got it. I didn't even need to say more. She had already been feeling this and knowing this. I love the expression on her face when she remembers fully and drops into that silent, full-bodied acknowledgment. It's the most met I've ever been in my natural state and it's when she's radiating a most profound vibration from the infinite depths of her true Self.

Partial Merger into God

I then asked her if I had her permission to try something. She said yes. I closed my eyes for most of it, as I tuned into her essence (her soul and totality-beingness (oversoul)). I then created a vacuum within my essence with which I allowed a percentage of her essence to merge with mine, before taking our partially merged essences up into a glimpse of merging with God and potentially even going beyond. A partial union occurred.

I did not want to take this too far as that would defeat her ability to choose out of her own free will if she would like to proceed farther at a later time. I would not want to keep someone hostage in Infinite Blissful Oneness, after all. I intended to give a glimpse of my/her/our true Self and the union that is possible for her with this One which gave rise to all the universes. There is only The One.

As our essences partially merged, I then opened a gateway to Infinity, so the glimpse of uniting in the Infinite could be sensed by her full being. This entire 'transmission' took maybe 2-3 minutes in Earth time.

Then we both opened our eyes and she had that beautiful emptiness, awe and surrender in her field again which I have seen several times before. It's pretty much as close as the female archetype can get to her full power. There are levels beyond that but this is the gateway state: complete surrender.

Unfortunately in our world today we have an attachment to seeing feminine independence as being the ultimate empowerment, which is something we both feel is out of alignment as it is a reaction to millennia of imbalanced abuse by the masculine. This topics is part of what we both wish to heal and address in our time together. But that's a side note. More to come at a later time (we are giving an exclusive retreat on similar topics August 6-9 in Sedona, btw. The event just got posted.)

Words weren't really necessary but since we wish to honor all aspects of each being's free will, I asked her verbally: "What did you experience?"

She said something along the lines of: "That perfect peace... Beyond individuality."

I then shared: "You see, this is the reason I feel hesitant to offer you my true Self consistently. This is why I, not you, stop the process of merger when it started happening a few times before. Because it will take away your life as you know it. When you get too close to the event horizon of the infinite, it will dissolve your structures of the self that you feel you are and the world that it has created to be of service to. I do not wish to take away your beautiful idea and creation of a life and dissolve its sense of individuality into God and the Infinite unless that is your highest excitement for yourself. And you still carry a subtle but powerful allegiance to your perspective of this world, almost feverishly so because you sense that this tether to this illusion is already so thin and unreal for you because of who you are and where you source yourself from that you avoid investigating it too much, and keep yourself beautifully and honorably busy with this perspective of 'your life.' 

And so it keeps you in a state of subtle asserted separation where to some degree the only way I can show up if I desire to be in relationship with you is by projecting myself as the other half of that separation-equation. Meaning I will need to project needs and imbalances and partialities that can then be met by your unique gifts as an individual, and the wounds that you can heal, as well as project myself as the healer that can heal your imbalances, etc. Beautiful and advanced as this already is, from this game of duality and being partial beings we can never attain complete union of Shiva and Shakti. 

Brahman (God) cannot become Parabrahman (Absolute) through our union from this assumption of each of us being a part of the whole, rather than the One Whole. First we need to dissolve the ego into God, then as God we can merge also into the Absolute. As long as you are a person, I will have to be one as well in order to be able to have a relationship with you. And that is ok, and it is by far the best relationship I've ever had, but it is not the ultimate of what we are capable of."

Again these words were hardly necessary as I could tell in her eyes that the experiential 2-3 minute glimpse showed her all of this naturally. But the words are still spoken as a way to solidify and confirm the experience had, so the physical mind can also agree to this and then have its experience of free will be honored.

Do you want Union?

I then asked: "Do you want this full merger, this dissolution of the ego?"

She replied: "Yes I do."

I asked again: "Are you absolutely sure?"

She replied: "Yes I am" again. I was scanning her field for any wobbles or doubts. Somewhat to my surprise I did not detect any!

I asked her one more time: "Are you sure sure?"

She said "Yes" once more.

Then I said: "I do not wish to take you away from this perspective you have of a beautiful life. Yet if you desire this merger and transcendence into God and the Beyond, an interesting question might be to simply ask yourself in the coming time: "What are my remaining attachments to (my perspectives of) this world which keep me feeling responsible to feel like a separate individual?""

A tear started rolling down her face as I could tell she was now experiencing the bittersweet heaviness/compassion that she has carried for humanity and the enlightenment of this planet since she can remember. She was feeling both the love, attachment as well as the weight of it.

This made her realize that this was a relevant question for her to look into at this junction in her life. She took it so beautifully, as always. And so she went on to go to the No Mind Festival cafeteria that evening while I had a cigar and a scotch with my friends Anurag and Ryan.

When she got home she seemed to be in a super authentic state of contemplation. Silent. Internal. Deeply considering her attachments, as well as exploring what it would be like to NOT choose this merger with me/her Self/God/Void, and keep her world view and sense of individuated/separate self alive. She was exploring all major angles to feel out where she stands with this authentically.

The Second Conversation

As I went up to the room to meet her and check in with her verbally (we do so telepathically all the time), she asked me the following question: "Are you comfortable in your body?"

To which I replied: "Yes. My body is happy, aligned, healthy and vibrant."

Then she said: "Ok that answers my question. In addition to wanting to serve humanity, I realized tonight what my tether to this world or role is. I have to let go of the egoic part in me that is attached to being the one that can help you in becoming more comfortable in your body."

I said: "Yes. For as long as we continue to entertain the idea that we are here as two individuals to play those healing roles for each other as if we are two parts rather than one whole, as beautiful as it is, I will have to continue to project a flawed or partial self around you for you to then heal and be in relationship with. For to feel like one is the other person's healer, one develops a sense of partiality or identity. Which I can match, but it is not the truth of what I am nor is it what you and I are capable of. What you are here to serve in me is so much more than making me feel comfortable in my body, so you can safely let go of that limited view. We will inevitably serve each other in our vehicles/bodies, but it should not be our aim for that sustains the sense of separation between us."

She nodded with the most beautiful and transparent expression on her face and said: "Yes. I know this is true."


And so that is the process as it stands. I felt inspired to write about this as I have been desiring to somehow document these off-stage moments in my life which often far exceed the brightness and intelligence of my teachings. I think their value is higher in many cases than listening to my teachings, if only I could show this more to the world. I am currently attracting the means to do so at least in some capacity.

I asked her if she was ok with me writing about this while she is still in the process of getting clear on her choice for herself. And she said yes.

Perhaps she will say yes to God's proposal of dissolution of ego. Perhaps she won't. Only Free Will will tell. Either way is beautiful and blessed, truly. After all, 'I' got all the timelessness in existence, and so does 'she.'

May you extract benefit, learning and expansion. 
Namaste,
Bentinho

PS - We will both be at the London One Day Event (July 9th) and the Netherlands Retreat (July 10-16). Come get a glimpse of divine union in the making :-), and let's all merge deeper into Union within ourselves.

Why I'm excited about my Netherlands Retreat - A Profound Blend...

For those interested in the Netherlands Retreat, Registration closes June 30th! 
Register here.


I've dug deep the past 6 months. The 5 years before then I've been firing on all cylinders pretty much without any time to myself. Quite literally. I've got a lot of cylinders and they were all firing together for years, so it's been an intense journey to stay balanced. Hence the need for a break from it all the past 6 months. 

It was time to step away from Trinfinity Corp and all the visions that were running through my vehicles (bodies). It was time to step away from all my friends, Boulder, and all the energies that I had been absorbing for those years. It was time ti step away from my own teachings as well. It was time to break up with my relationship at the time. 

It was time to come back into my own truth completely, free of any and all distortions of others.

So I got dengue fever and was bed ridden for over 2 weeks in Bali, then spent a week in total darkness (literal darkness) retreating, been away from everything I had in Boulder for months, and cleansed myself from my past. Cleared my attachments to people's well-being and the outcome of their lives, as well as any remaining attachments I had to their friendships or understanding of me, my intentions and my choices.

I've come out the other end of this break away feeling profoundly emptied out again of the accumulated subtleties of 'others' which when compounded add up to imbalances; layers of dust distorting the clarity of the mirror.

I feel deeply rejuvenated through the Self-Realization path that I gave myself the opportunity to dive into again more fully. Then I started the Sedona Experiment, which enabled 12 others to dive in profoundly as well in an accelerated fashion. Then I decided to take that to a larger audience and started the Self Realization School in Sedona. All sessions can be viewed at www.BentinhoMassaro.tv.

And so I feel renewed, clearer and emptier than ever before. And what I've noticed is that in more recent weeks, Manifestation/Creation has been re-ignited or rather re-allowed to enter my experience and consume some of my time and attention. Self-Actualization and an ever deepening and more balanced service-to-others is re-appearing into my field, without it distracting from my more absolute levels ("I-I", and Beyondness/Absolute) any longer. Without it adding layers that I don't want added.

When I notice I accumulate something, I shed it right there and then and it's all too clear to take hold. Little to nothing is accumulated or taken on anymore which is a grand relief to my vehicles. I have my dedication to deepening my Self Realization and letting go of everything over the past 6 months to thank for. Which is part of why I wished to focus on optimizing and modernizing this path and taking people deeper into it experientially than ever before through the Self-Realization School and the Sedona Experiment (which will become a book/report/case study to be released later this year).

You've heard me mention True Simultaneity before as being the highest accomplishment. What I experience now is the next level of that. And I am more determined than ever to create an army of Shepherding Consciousnesses' who truly get what I am, and thus are able to activate that frequency in themselves.

The Netherlands Retreat - A New Blend of Realization and Actualization

The Netherlands retreat will be the first retreat of mine (and the biggest residential one yet!) where I will blend Self-Actualization back into Self-Realization, but in a much deeper way than before. Manifestation, empowerment, understanding your purpose, your calling, law of attraction... these are all natural attributes of this Grand Illusion and are innate in each individuated speck of the One Consciousness and they deserve to be understood properly in context with the deeper truth of Oneness and Beyondness.

So in the Netherlands retreat I intend to deliver a very rich and appropriate blend of profound freedom through Self Realization as well as using the powers innate in all of us--connected to the field of infinite possibilities--in very deep ways. 

Whereas before the empowerment teachings were designed mostly for the more mainstream crowd and the beginning spiritual adepts, what I will teach at the The Netherlands Retreat will be much more rooted in Faith, Surrender, and total Confidence. Using the powers of Creation and letting them work for and through you by aligning to the appropriate state which unlocks these capacities, rather than using them from a mental level of separation.

I want the individuals that attend my retreats to become one with the God State and possibly even pop through into the Stateless Absolute, and from that union or disappearance express themselves as the most radiant, loving beacons the world has ever seen.

Let's lovingly generate an army of Shepherding Consciousnesses to hold the frequency as the majority of people are attempting to transition from 3rd to 4th Density as we speak. Shepherds need to have integrated important understandings from the higher densities as well if we wish to hold space and understanding and shine a light upon the people of Earth as they innocently navigate their way into the next frequency domain of love/understanding/connection/remembrance (4th Density).

I'm excited for the Netherlands Retreat. Registration closes June 30th. Two weeks left to sign up here. 

Sending you all much love, and hope to see all Europeans in The Netherlands for an incredibly powerful residential coming together of powerful souls looking to deepen their realization, manifestation, and service to All in a shared space together. What could be more powerful an act of service to this planet?

Bentinho.

PS - Here's a little video Ryan cut out from one of the sessions of the Self Realization School:

All images in this post were taken by Alex and Anne

How looking forward to death makes you come truly alive

Our lives are but temporary, intentional expressions of who we are before, during and after this incarnation. Do not be blinded by or cling to your life, for such limited view will distort the very intention from which your consciousness created this life. Let death open your eyes so True Life can flow through you and into this world. 

Introduction

Most people that I meet seem to live in an unconscious assumption that they are going to live forever, looking forward only to 'the rest of their life.' They think they are here 'to be alive,' when in actuality they are here because of an intention they had before incarnating. Life is not meant to just 'be lived as one's own,' rather it is meant to be understood as a temporary expression flowing out of one's eternal Soul.

People who get blinded by the limited scope of this life, often have goals that are oriented toward their establishment in this particular life (maintenance): accumulation, security, ensuring they are building the life they wish to have in the future, seeking safe, solid ground, steady does it, lots of preparation, hopes, expectations, needs, etc.

While I fundamentally don't judge anything, I do feel it's helpful to share observations and trends so we can become more conscious of these tendencies that limit our free will and greatly and painfully distort our connection to Spirit and Truth.

Death is ever imminent; what keeps me alive?

To me it is ever obvious that I could pop out of my physical life at any given moment, if purposefulness runs out.

We all have a life line of sorts which connects our consciousness to our bodily expression for as long as it is relevant and purposeful to be here. For me this purpose-line that connects me to this body and density consists of only one type of energy, and that is service to this collective. There is no other reason for my being here. Sure I learn or rather remember a lot, and refine very subtle dynamics and balances, but those are necessary side effects for me to be who I can be to then support humanity's transition. And these lessons and refinements once they pass a certain threshold of subtlety, are bonuses as they then start refining Soul's (im)balances which helps me progress (dissolve more into All That Is) at a Soul level after this life. But the clear and primary intention for being here is to be of service to this density/world.

Here are some examples of what determines whether I stick around or not: 

Do I (still) have a purpose here? Does my presence add value to this planet? Can I transform a system or niche that no one else can at this moment? Can I bring clarity where there is a lack thereof? Can I reinvent a system or service or bust a collective taboo or belief that is outdated and holds people back from entering a full-fledged fourth density civilization?

Can I teach by example by embodying and consequently transparently sharing some type of niche-journey, a unique passion, or by demonstrating struggle, failure or achievement that others can extract learning from to apply to the acceleration of their lives? Can I increase the overall frequency of planet Earth/humanity?

If any of these questions is a strong energetic YES, I stick around. If that ever fails to be the case, I will disappear. You see, nobody will never have to be sad over my death. It only means to fulfilled my intention for being here.

This awareness of human life as a highly temporary, intentional appearance and inevitable disappearance gives me a fearlessness and sense of scope/perspective that not many people carry with them consciously on a day to day basis. 

You can never be free with something you identify with. Hence I say dis-identify with 'your life' so you can be free while living.

Most people identify with this particular life, and forget that they are Death, or rather the eternal beingness-consciousness they are beyond incarnation. As a result, we have all the struggle, greed, fear, victimization and weakness that we have, because we give way too much significance to comfort, safety, longevity, maintenance. We forget all the qualities that I believe matter significantly more: Inspiration, service, love, compassion, purpose, transmission, fearlessness, play, bravery, acts of courage, transparence, adventure, radical changes, super acceleration.

Valuing your life kills you. Valuing your death makes you come alive!

Think about it. Practically everyone arounds you wakes up each day thinking this life is just the way it is, that it is the container for their identity and they make tiny little steps each day in the direction of greater safety or marginal growth, attempting to ensure greater happiness down the line, or accumulate more things for their future. Attempting to control destiny and freedom.

Most people we know have been doing this for decades, and still they have not arrived; they are not happy. They change at the pace of a snail. They miss incredible opportunities to find magic and union with God through this magnificent adventure we call life...

You see, when we give our temporary life too much significance, we start stagnating and slowly kill ourselves. We block the fountain of youth, the power of grace, the abundance of fearless living. We don't learn nearly as much of the lessons as this incarnation can hold for us because we do not prioritize the real reason we are here, over the life itself. We stop accelerating. We start overthinking. We block our hearts, limit our potential expression in this life, the amounts of lives we can touch, and our sense of freedom. 

To feel like your life is the container for your identity, makes you feel small and vulnerable, like a victim. And consequently you start prioritizing safety and maintenance or accumulation over truth, growth, learning, giving, expressing, and yes... living.

Thinking about life kills you; thinking about death makes you come alive.
— Bentinho Massaro


Those people who have developed an acute awareness of their imminent death can see that this life is a meaningless game that we can make entirely our own, according to our purpose and Soul's intentions. We can make this life so much more incredible and worthwhile when we stop giving it so much significance. See it for what it is: an expression of your soul.

When you give the vehicle through which you came here to express yourself more significance (survival, safety, comfort, security) than why you came here (to live freely, fully, and to give, bust paradigms, love, teach, and learn), you have begun dying.

This is why longevity practices and learning about the body can only benefit us so much: ultimately the best way to stay young forever, is to understand your particular intention for being here and by prioritizing your soul's purpose for this life over the vehicle which you created to express that purpose.

Look into taking care of the body and its circumstances all you want, you will find nothing but the inevitability of death, missed freedom, and a misplacement of priority.

How many times per day do we get lost in the details of this life, all because we don't look forward to death? All because we are looking forward only into 'the rest of our life.' We are planning ahead. We forget to live. We're not futuristic enough. We're fooled by our minds who take this physical incarnation to be our identity, and thus we prevent an unspeakable joy and adventurous purity from entering our Hearts and expressing through us, finding root in this Density for others to learn from and feel more alive from.

We are here to create and experience change and transformation; we are here to mess things up in the best and most radical way possible. We are here to live from death, not die from living.

Please remember that death is far more true, eternal, and certain than this incarnation! Don't put the cart before the horse. Do not be blinded by the assumption that you are living a life that is in any way significant. Understanding the insignificance of this life is key to attaining immortality and eternal love/joy/liberation and making good use of your time here.

As a result, a truth and a bliss will flow into this life, but this bliss will come from that true place within... it won't come from the comings and the goings, nor from the stability you have ensured your physical life to have.

Sure, build your home on solid rock. Follow TAO in how you create your life, but always remember that the mystery of the One Infinite Creator is the only power in all of Creation, and the only way to life a fulfilling life is to die in complete trust to that Infinite Mystery. 

See this life in context of its extremely insignificant and temporary nature, and you will be ale to make some real change in this world and positively affect lives while having a magical time and leaving behind an example for people to write about, learn from, and be inspired by for generations to come.

This is a time on our planet to speed up, not slow down. To let go, not control or maintain. Consider your life already over... already doomed... now what would you do with the time that remains?

Maintenance/security is the destroyer of our life force, our light, our purpose. To seek for security is the surest way to death at the end of an unfulfilling life.

As my close friend Bruce Lee once stated: 

Ask daily not what you need to do that day, but what your death-bed self wishes you would have done that day...

I daily consider this life from the angle of having already died, looking back, and seeing if I feel proud of myself and satisfied with the choices I made, the level of faith and fearlessness I had, and the purity of service I cultivated. 

Again, when we make the container or vehicle which is this temporary life too significant in our minds, we start making decisions based on insignificant things seeming significant to us, instead of creating true magic for everyone around us, including naturally ourselves.

When you benefit others, you will always grow in happiness.

I encourage you to view this life form the vantage point of having already died... From Spirit, looking back on this life right now, what would you rather be doing, creating, believing, exploring, and giving significance to? What is truly and only important? Which parallel reality do you wish to step into fully?

Be more of service. Change with the change. Surrender to the acceleration of realities that is occurring on our planet today. Resistance is futile and sucks the purpose/life out of you.

At any given moment you have the power to believe in your potential, and activate the field of infinite possibilities in a different way simply by choosing faith and changing your perspective, thus then shifting into a parallel reality and attracting something completely new to yourself. Something that was always there but simply was not allowed by your definitions.

Step into Heaven. It is already here, hiding beneath your misplaced significance.

The fearful ones have poured their power and courage into insignificant things, whereas the brave ones have invested their power and placed their trust in what truly matters. That is the only difference between the brave ones and the frightened ones: misplaced significance.

Remember who you are. 
Remember why you're here.
Drop giving significance to everything else, and the indescribable love for life will return to your Heart, effortlessly support you in all desires, and set your journey ablaze with a fearlessness and purposeful ecstasy you never knew you had in you.

Your body is the pen with which you can write your ode to the One Infinite Creator. Do not live this life for the sake of the pen and its maintenance, live it for the purpose that birthed it, for the hand that can write its ode.

Die into your golden Self, your Spirit, the Infinite Creator. Surrender. Fall backwards. Know God.

Now what are you going to do today? What will you choose?

Infinite love,
Bentinho